Justin Bobby Brings Me Back

I'm embarassed to say that I had a brief moment of deja vu while watching the latest episode of MTV's The Hills. And no, unfortunately it was not during one of the more glamorous scenes at Area or Brody Jenner's beach house in Malibu. Instead, it was during Justin Bobby's pathetic attempt to talk his way out of Audrina breaking up with him. For those of you who do not watch this show (shame on you, it's high comedy), Audrina claims to have seen boyfriend Justin Bobbby kissing another girl at the club - and so did all her friends. During the "break up talk," JB gets angry that she believes her friends because [direct quote], "Of course they are going to say that, your friends don't fathom me whatsoever." Really JB? Fathom? Was that you just now attempting to use semi-big words? What I cannot fathom is how you could F up the usage of that word. I'll put my grammar gear on for a second and say that while technically a synonym of fathom could potentially work in that sentence, it's still a huge stretch and I'm guessing genius JB was going for the more commonly used word "favor," which, confusing as it may be, also starts with the letter F. Anyways, it brought me back a few years to a simliar "dealbreaker" dating moment of my own. I was having dinner with this guy when we somehow got on the topic of sweeteners (yes, clearly a scintillating date already), and said boy began to pontificate on how he can't use artificial sweeteners or drink diet soda because he can't stand the aftertaste: "it's that aspartame (pronounced ass-part-a-MEE)," he said very assuredly. Yes, asspartamee. I was expecting "pardonmeimanass" to follow, but it didn't - nor did another date obviously. I know it sounds totally petty, but he was just so cocky about his distaste for something he couldn't even pronounce! Plus, it was really more the straw that broke the camel's back, as was the case with Justin Bobby (who has exhibited far too many red flags to mention, but for starters there's the story behind his name; his vehicle of choice is an El Camino; he tries way too hard to be Johnny Depp; he has an extreme penchant for burping in people's faces; he wears combat boots to the beach and he once abandoned Audrina in Vegas).
I'm a little bit dissapointed that both http://www.tvwithoutpity.com/ and http://www.imbringingbloggingback.blogspot.com/, two of my fave entertainment/celeb gossip blogs, failed to call Justin out on this comment, so I felt it was my duty. But I'm still holding out hope that Joel McHale will chew up Justin Bobby and spit him back out in the most hilarious way possible on the next episode of The Soup (fingers crossed).